How hard can it be?

Having mixed feelings about this whole WordPress vs. Blogspot thing. I look at my WordPress page, and then at this Blogspot one, and it feels so odd O: It's like I can't believe they're both mine.

For some reason I feel more sophisticated using WordPress.

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Went for a movie with the boys today. It's been awhile, and it's awesome to feel like some part of what I've been missing is back, to say the least :)

Watched Transformers 2, again. Didn't have that at-the-edge-of-my-seat effect, as compared to the first time, of course, but I understood it a whole lot better this time. Thanks Mas :D Oh, there was this little boy sitting a row in front of us; gosh, was he the cutest thing ever :D Only Mas and I were paying attention to him, though, 'cause we'd already seen the movie before. Well, he was sooo restless; standing and sitting and standing and sitting again, aaah! :D Effing adorable. There was even this one part where he stood up and started flinging his arms around, going "aahuuhaahuuhaah" :DDD hee, I can't wait to have kids :))

Well, there was a down side to my day as well. But I don't really know where to start. Like, how do you start talking about how you feel about something so minor? Something so unexpected, and totally inconspicuous to others. I mean, if it were to happen to someone else, it would pass by like a plane in the sky; greeted by an "Oh, hey, would you look at that", and forgotten in a flash. I suppose for me, it's just one of those times when you're so pissed off and hurt, and you have no idea who to blame. It's when you're drowning and suffocating in regret, disappointment, jealousy, and so much more, and you're yelling at yourself to stop having those ridiculous thoughts, but no matter how hard you try, there just isn't a way to simply calm down and bring all that pessimism racing through your head to a halt. It's one of those things I can never bring myself to just let be. One of those things that get to me and stay trapped in my chest until somehow, some way, I find a solution to it.

It's really hard for me, but, you'll never understand.

I think I got over it though. Ali said something about why I shouldn't be jealous, and it made a whole lotta sense. That is, if whatever that was is true and applicable, which it very likely isn't.

Okay, I won't go on. I'm saying all this with so much ambiguity, there's really no point. I'm just gonna go to bed and think it over just a little bit more.

Or maybe I'll talk to God tonight.

I just hope you were right.

Love, Sheryl.